Bo's Birthday

"And this year's Albert Einstein award for Excellence in Innovation goes to... Elias McDaniel!"

Rapturous applause greets the man from McComb, Mississippi, who rises slowly to nonchalantly accept his award: a solid gold sheriff's badge inscribed with the famous mass-energy equivalence-equation.

"Eee-equals-em-cee-Squared. I am the world's first A-Tomic gunslinger, y'all better watch me now."

Later, in the winter of that auspicious year, Bo received a letter marked with the seal of The White House: a gracious invitation from the President. A joint party was to be held between the birthdays of the two men, in the first week of January.

"Ooo wee BO you know I understand!" cried Eileen when she heard the news.

"Shut up, woman. Diddley talking. I ain't going to no jive party with that cracker fool. Even his mama calls him Dick."

Eventually persuaded by sweet Eileen, Bo pinned his Einstein sheriff's badge to his biggest stetson hat and boarded Air Force One from O'Hare Chicago to Washington National Airport.

On arrival he was greeted by Dick himself in the back seat of a Lincoln limousine.

"Hello, Mr Diddley."

"Hello, Mr President."

Later, at the party on the lawn at The White House, the president invites the man from McComb to carry the torch at the Independence Day parade in Chicago.

"Listen, Dick, I play guitar and sing. I ain't walking in no parade. Do you want me to go down like JFK?"

The president sweats and shudders and looks to his aides.

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